Sometimes leadership does not feel like leading. It feels like tolerating.
Tolerating the unspoken expectations.
Tolerating one more unnecessary meeting.
Tolerating being the go-to, the fixer, the one who always knows what to do, even when you are quietly running on fumes.
We tell ourselves this is what high performers do. We normalize the discomfort. We minimize our own exhaustion until the tolerance becomes invisible and unsustainable.
In my work delivering leadership coaching for senior executives, this is often the moment we begin. Not with a strategy. Not with a five-year plan. But with a simple, powerful question:
What are you tolerating that is quietly draining you?
Burnout Does Not Always Announce Itself
Burnout is not always dramatic. Sometimes it is slow. Subtle. Professional.
It looks like productivity on the outside and depletion on the inside.
You are still showing up. Still overdelivering. Still saying yes when you know you need to pause. You are being seen as successful, even as you feel increasingly disconnected from the work that once gave you energy.
This kind of success can hide burnout in plain sight. The achievements are real, but the cost is high. And it does not have to be this way.
What if the real solution is getting clear, not doing more?
What Clarity in Leadership Really Means
Clarity in leadership means knowing what matters and what you are no longer willing to hold. It is about alignment, not overload.
Your leadership brand starts there. It begins with how clearly you define what you stand for and what you let go of.
Here is what I often see when leaders begin to realign:
- They stop trying to be the hero
- They stop saying yes to things that are not theirs
- They stop accepting urgency as proof of importance
- They stop doing more in order to feel like enough
And what begins to emerge is space, margin, strategy, and power.
A Coaching Moment That Changed the Trajectory
A senior leader I worked with had recently taken on a bigger role. She was leading a larger team, managing increased expectations, and holding the emotional weight of every person’s needs.
She came to our session exhausted. “I feel like I am doing everything right,” she said, “but I still don’t feel like a leader.”
We stepped back. We looked at her calendar, her inbox, her meetings, her messaging. It became really clear. SHE was not broken. Her BOUNDARIES were.
She began making small shifts.
She declined meetings she did not need to be in.
She changed her communication style to focus on outcomes instead of overexplaining.
She clarified what she would own and what she would not.
And in doing so, she did not shrink her leadership. She expanded it.
That is what leadership coaching for senior executives is about. Creating space for real growth and clarity, not just more performance.
You Do Not Need to Earn Rest
One of the most dangerous leadership myths is that you can rest once you deserve it.
That once you finish the project, land the deal, fix the thing, then you can take a breath.
But rest is not a reward. Rest is a requirement for clear thinking, grounded decisions, and sustainable leadership.
What you tolerate becomes your brand.
What you normalize becomes your culture.
And what you reclaim becomes your leadership power.
Final Thought
If you are tired, it does not mean you are doing it wrong. It means you are paying attention to what is no longer working.
Leadership is not just about what you take on. It is about what you let go of and delegate. Clarity in leadership is not selfish. It is strategic.
So ask yourself the question most leaders avoid.
What are you tolerating that is quietly draining you?
And more importantly, what are you ready to DO about it?
Ready to lead with clarity and boundaries that support your growth?
Learn how executive coaching can help you reclaim your energy and lead with intention, or bring this conversation to your team through leadership workshops or keynote speaking.
Get in touch here to start the conversation.
